Personal Growth…What Does That Even Mean?

Self-help. Self-development. Self-love. Self-care. Self-improvement. Personal development. Personal growth. What do these terms mean? Well, they all pretty much refer to the same thing — taking steps to improve one’s life and well-being emotionally, physically, mentally, socially, spiritually, intellectually, financially, and morally; working to create or further success, happiness, awareness, effectiveness, and maturity; striving to reach one’s full potential.

Whether you read blogs or books or listen to podcasts or go to conferences, there are a few topics that come up consistently when it comes to personal growth. However, what those topics mean and how to apply them to your own life isn’t always clear and doesn’t always relate to you. What one person wants to work on another person may be proficient in. The strategy that works for one person may not work for another person.

This post will provide a brief overview of some of the most common areas of personal growth but is by no means all inclusive. Subsequent posts will delve further into these topics as well as others.

Accountability

Accountability is taking responsibility for actions taken or not taken. It is about owning your results, both good and bad, rather than blaming others or making excuses or waiting for things to fix themselves. To be accountable is to acknowledge reality and embrace it, to find solutions and make things happen.

Baby Steps

Significant change or improvement does not happen overnight. It also doesn’t happen when we try to focus on too many things at once. It’s about making progress rather than achieving perfection. Set goals and outline steps to get there. Work on one thing at a time.

Being Uncomfortable

Staying in our comfort zone leads to a life of sameness. We can’t expect different results when we don’t actually do anything differently. As uncomfortable as it is, we have to get comfortable with being uncomfortable. If we want a different life, we have to do things that we haven’t done before and we have to have experiences we haven’t had before. Any personal growth guru out there will tell you being uncomfortable is unavoidable.

Comparing self to others

This is an extremely difficult thing to get away from. We constantly compare ourselves to others. How attractive we are, our weight, the clothes we wear, the cars we drive, the size and value of our homes, how much money we make. These are just a few of the multitude of ways we compare ourselves to our friends, family, neighbors, celebrities, co-workers, and even strangers. In reality, the only comparison we should ever make is to previous versions of ourselves. Ask yourself how have you grown since yesterday? In the last week? Month? Year? That is the comparison that matters in personal growth.

Confidence

I can’t stress enough how crucial it is to have a healthy level of self-confidence. It’s pretty hard to achieve personal growth if you don’t believe in your ability to do so. And if you don’t believe in yourself others will have a hard time believing in you too. Luckily, there are tons of ways to build self-confidence. Much more on this in the near future!

Consistency

One and done is not an effective strategy for change. Real and lasting change requires consistency. Just as we don’t expect to be physically fit after only one workout, we can’t expect monumental advances in our personal growth after meditating one time, refraining from caring about others’ opinions only occasionally, or eating a salad for lunch one day a week but eating fried foods and cake the rest. We must be relentless in our pursuit and consistent in our actions.

Exercise and eating right

This is probably the most obvious of all areas of personal growth. It’s also one of the most important. I’d be willing to bet everyone has heard of the benefits to be gained from regular exercise and eating healthier and drinking plenty of water, so I won’t harp on it here. I’ll just say that despite the very clear evidence of the advantages, many of us (myself included!) do not always follow recommended guidelines in these areas.

Fun

Fun things in life are so, so, so important to overall happiness. As cliche as it sounds, it’s true — life is too short to take too seriously. If we work hard toward personal growth but don’t enjoy ourselves what is the point?? Work on being your best self, but have some freaking fun!

Gratitude

A popular piece of advice in personal growth is to adopt an attitude of gratitude. Science shows that doing this can actually make us happier. Gratitude is to appreciate and be thankful for things, big or small. We can show gratitude with a thank you card, by volunteering in our community, or simply saying thank you to the person who held the door open. Many people keep a gratitude list and note several things they are grateful for every day. Some ways to do this are mentally or in a journal or on your phone.

Intentions

Personal growth does not just accidentally happen. We have to do it on purpose, meaning we can’t just study the topics and wait for good things to come. We must consciously do what we need to do to improve our lives as well as be deliberate in our actions.

Meditation/Mindfulness

There are so many benefits to be gained from meditation such as reduced stress, increased focus, relaxation, and improved emotional health, to name a few. There are also a ton of ways to mediate, from focusing on breathing to reflection to repeating a mantra. I know a lot of people think it’s hokey, but I swear it works!

Other People’s Opinions

To put it simply and bluntly, other people’s opinions DO. NOT. MATTER. Seriously. When we live in fear of what others think we aren’t really living our own lives. Instead we are living the way we think others want us to live. In my opinion, this is by far the most difficult thing to overcome. To be honest, I hesitated in starting my blog at first because I was afraid of what other people would think. After a few weeks of playing with the idea in my mind I finally got to a place where I do not care if I am not living somebody else’s dream for me or living up to somebody else’s expectations. I have a lot to say on this topic and can’t wait to dig in deeper.

Perception

Perception involves our senses and determines how we experience the world around us; it’s how we understand something, how we interpret and respond to something. Ever head the saying, “Your perception is your reality”? It’s true.

Be Your Best YOU

Clearly, personal growth is an extensive topic. These are just a few of the most common topics in personal growth.

To each his or her own. Maybe you don’t care to mediate but do want to work on your confidence. Or perhaps you read the books and keep the journal and meditate, many of the things the self-help gurus tell you to focus on, but you can’t remember the last time your cheeks hurt from laughing or the last time you did something fun. Or maybe other people’s opinions paralyze and prevent you from doing the things you want to do. Everybody is different and will care about different aspects of personal growth.

One of the most important things to remember is that nobody is perfect and nobody ever will be. We will never know everything there is to know. We will never learn everything there is to learn. We will never be so great that we should stop trying to grow.

We are all a work in progress!